These are the things we fear losing. We fear to lose our own pride in ourselves. Our dignity and honour is put ahead of anything else and we strive to not lose this. We fear to face the truth of the matter, that we are not perfect. Which brings me to the second most important thing we fear of losing, respect of others. We hide the deepest things inside so that people will not think less of us, so that we are put on that pedestal of others’ eyes.

Why do we do this, because we like being on top. We enjoy the fact someone looks up to us, and sees someone they respect. It brings us joy to hear when someone respects you for who you are and what you believe in.

The problem is we want too much of this. Our lives are always centered around doing the best (especially if you are Chinese). There is no second place in the eyes of the Chinese parents. We build all this up ourselves in that we always strive for no less than anyone else. If there is someone to be had, we want the most. If there is a race, we must be first. Highest mark in school, best piano performance.

So back to the story here, yesterday I talked about the small group at CC sharing their most deepest thoughts and openly confessing their sins. Today was more of this. Today I went to CCF (the start of the summer program) where we did some sharing of our own on our experiences there at CC. Thanks to Andrew for sharing his experiences with us today (a smaller group) and how great it was for him to finally breakout. I hope it’s okay for us to name names. So Andrew shared with our small group how House A sharing went, and how the Holy Spirit worked through him to bring out all his sins.

So he talked about how hard it was (and I can attest to that, I mean think about it, telling everyone your deepest secrets) to tell all. The hardest part in confessing any sin is the barrier of your own pride. As humans, we do not want to admit we are wrong. But only through getting to the lowest of lows and breaking down the barrier of pride do we gain honor from others. It is so hard to tell people your secrets, because you fear of losing peoples’ respect. Especially when you are older than some of the brothers and sisters around you, you feel you have a reputation to hold on to.

“A man's pride brings him low, but a man of lowly spirit gains honor.”
Proverbs 29:23

A sister in Christ said it best in our group, how she has so much more respect for those who confess, thus showing they are human. Too often do we look at someone and put them on that pedestal making it harder for that person to jump down and confess. The higher and higher we put them, the more scared we all get of jumping, because it can either be suicide (and lose everything) or there is a cushion down there to break the fall. Too often are we so high up, that we fail to see God is our cushion beneath, that he will protect us when we fall.

So a great thing has come about as a result of House A Sharing. There is in the development a men’s support group so we can all be accountable to others about our sins. Thanks for Mike Mak for starting this network, truly this will be great. As I said before, I too am a victim of satan’s work and have impure thoughts. Personally, I think this lie I’ve been keeping to myself has been so much of a burden I could not keep it to myself. But I believe this support group is the work of God, He is here to help all us men who fight with satan daily about sex. Through this network we are to continue responding to the movement of God’s spirit. I was doing some searching on Bible Gateway for a verse, and low and behold, the Verse of the Day:

"Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves." -- Romans 12:10

So let us all be together in brotherly love.